those devilish patreon lads

[franzkafka]

Those patreon lads are no slouches.  I upgraded to the third jamp tier from the second one  on January 30th, naively thinking they would apply the upgrade  to the next payment due on February but they immediately backdated my upgrade to January 1st and relieved me of £22 - being the difference between the two tiers for the month. On February 1st, they took another £33. Is this a record?  I fear I'll no longer make the Times rich list.

Now that I think about it, I originally joined towards the end of a month and they immediately charged me for a month, then charged me again 3 days later or something like that. As the girl said, fook me once fook you, fook me twice fook me!

Let that be a warning to all of you to join up at the beginning of a month.

Yours sadly...

Ebenezer Kafka

[kwaing]

Those devils - but it’s all good for January’s payment gets you the OOTWINS cassette album (January’s album of the month) that we post out this month now we know there’s one extra to make, that being your copy, and February’s relatively swift payment gets you this month’s album of the month, the music for which I am working feverishly on, to listen to until you receive it as a physical item start of March.

March’s payment will secure you access to March’s “live” event and whatever else is coming at you physically start of April.

3 months of subscription, 3 months of delayed physical goodness.

[franzkafka]

Excellent!
Air miles?.....free week at your spa?....

I'll have to go up in the attic now to dust down my cassette player, it's been a while.  Hope the wind-up handle is still with it.

[kwaing]

Next time you’re being chased by the Leven polis, take a left at Abdul’s roundabout and then a half shut penknife left at the double roundabout and park up outside Legends. If you time it correctly the jam sandwich will tear off up the St.Andrews road leaving you to view at your leisure the brand new boxed tape decks I spotted in Archie Cromar’s window. Cheap as about 15 pokes of his namesake’s chips.

[franzkafka]

'Next time you’re being chased by the Leven polis, take a left at Abdul’s roundabout and then a half shut penknife left at the double roundabout and park up outside Legends. If you time it correctly the jam sandwich will tear off up the St.Andrews road '

I had hoped you were giving me the directions to your spa!

[kwaing]

I was - it’s round the back of Legends. The tape machines were a red herring.

[franzkafka]

Leven is my favourite spa town.  It's like Bath on the Forth (or bath in the Forth?) and I'm sure that Legends will be just like Stobo Castle with bouncers.  Can't wait, who should I say sent me?