Author Topic: Arr Yoo Edgykated?  (Read 1044 times)

Uncle Ellwyn

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Arr Yoo Edgykated?
« on: Thu, Jun 27, 2013, 20:25 PM »
Jokes which supposedly you have to be educated to understand...
Supposedly.

A photon is going through airport security. The TSA agent asks if he has any luggage. The photon says, "No, I'm traveling light."

Pretentious? Moi?

A logician's wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad. The wife says, "Is it a boy or a girl?" The logician says, "Yes."

How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?
Ask them to pronounce "unionized."

Two women walk into a bar and talk about the Bechdel test.

Heard about that new band called 1023 MB? They haven't had any gigs yet.

Heisenberg was speeding down the highway. A cop pulls him over and says "Do you have any idea how fast you were going back there?"
Heisenberg says, "No, but I knew where I was."

C, Eb, and G walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, no minors."

First Law of Thermodynamics: You can't win.
Second Law of Thermodynamics: You can't break even.
Third Law of Thermodynamics: You can't stop playing.

If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

A linguistics professor says during a lecture that, "In English, a double negative forms a positive.
But in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, in no language in the world can a double positive form a negative."
But then a voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."

Knock knock. Who's there? Knock knock. Who's there? Knock knock. Who's there? Knock knock. Who's there? Philip Glass.

What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac do at night? He stays up wondering if there really is a dog.

Kimmers

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Re: Arr Yoo Edgykated?
« Reply #1 on: Thu, Jun 27, 2013, 20:37 PM »
A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, " How much for a beer?"
The bartender looks at him and says: "For you, it's no charge".

Uncle Ellwyn

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Re: Arr Yoo Edgykated?
« Reply #2 on: Fri, Jun 28, 2013, 01:24 AM »
A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, " How much for a beer?"
The bartender looks at him and says: "For you, it's no charge".

 :) 8)

Kimmers

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Re: Arr Yoo Edgykated?
« Reply #3 on: Fri, Jun 28, 2013, 10:41 AM »
A guy walks into a bar and says "I'll have H2O." Another guy says "I'll have H2O, too." The second guy died.

Oh I could go on all day. I had an organic chem prof who started every lecture with a cheesy joke.  ;D